Love Notes from the Heart

I'm not your typical girly girl. I don't like the color pink. My favorite color is blue. I never had a Barbie doll growing up. I played with Legos and beat Ben at Monopoly. I don't like hearts. I'm more of a star kind of girl. I don't expect Prince Charming to come sweep me off my feet. I make my dreams happen myself. I ask guys out. I don't spend hours getting ready and can barely apply eyeliner correctly. I don't like movies like The Wedding Planner and How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I take out the garbage, change light bulbs, and even unclog toilets when I have to. I'm an engineer. However, that's not to say that I don't appreciated being treated like a girl.

But can someone explain to me why 3M has decided to send me 2 pads of free post-it notes in the shape of a heart? One of these pads showed up at work and the other at my apartment. These pads include purple, hot pink, and baby pink post-its. Is this their way of trying to get me to embrace my estrogen? Do they send these things to guys?

I've decided that I'm going to slap one of these hot pink hearts on to all of my memos at work. Let's see how the manly engineers like these.

Love Me Even More

Back to what I do best: fill out forms.

Thirteen random things you like:
1. Waking up and feeling the sun beaming on my face
2. Having a patient tell me that I've made a difference in his/her life
3. Finishing an entire crossword puzzle by myself
4. The way Law McGraw pushes the hair out of my face
5. Seeing someone's eyes light up when they get excited about something
6. The feeling of sand in between my toes on a beach
7. The sun setting behind the Chicago skyline
8. Being caught up in the hustle and bustle in the city without a care in the world
9. The sound of the crashing "waves" on the Evanston lake fill
10. Seeing a father hold his baby for the first time
11. Baby penguins waddling at the zoo
12. Receiving an unexpected letter, card, postcard, or package in the mail
13. The adrenaline rush that kicks in while I'm running

Twelve good movies:
1. Memento
2. The Usual Suspects
3. Lost in Translation
4. Never Been Kissed (two words: Michael Vartan)
5. Amelie
6. Love Actually
7. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
8. Garden State
9. The Shawshank Redemption
10. Best in Show
11. Infernal Affairs
12. Sideways

Eleven good bands/artists:
1. Belle and Sebastian
2. Norah Jones
3. Elliott Smith
4. Dave Matthews (come on, you have to admit that the man is somewhat talented)
5. Counting Crows
6. Coldplay
7. Wilco
8. Snow Patrol
9. Modest Mouse
10. Jimmy Eat World
11. Nestor (my favorite open mic performer)

Ten things about you ... physically:
1. I have stick straight hair
2. I have virgin hair (it's never been dyed or highlighted)
3. I have a fold in only one of my eyelids (and this seems to flutter from right to left)
4. I have ridiculously long toes
5. I wear size 7 shoes
6. I weigh less than Mikers' dogs
7. I'm convinced that my left leg is slightly longer than my right leg
8. I have a very big head
9. My left hand is purely for symmetrical reasons
10. I don't so much have the "birthing" hips

Seven favorite drinks:
1. milk
2. Nantucket Nectarfizz
3. Orangina
4. Green beer
5. the Lincolnshire Lager
6. frozen mango margarita
7. Mango Madness Snapple

Six Things that annoy you:
1. People who constantly complain that their lives are so difficult
2. People who type LiKE tHiS
3. Emails that have no punctuation in them
4. People who brake like banshees on the highway
5. People who don't appreciate how lucky and fortunate they are
6. People who think that they're better than everyone

Five things you touch everyday:
1. Ernie (my cellphone)
2. Harry (my laptop)
3. my car
4. the PHD
5. my toothbrush

Four shows you watch:
1. Gilmore Girls
2. Law and Order (SVU, Trial by Jury, etc...)
3. Check Please!
4. Jack and Bobby

Three things you look for in a guy:
1. Loving/Caring
2. Trustworthy
3. Smart and Witty

Two things you hate:
1. When someone/something hurts one of my friends
2. Mayor Daley's Political Machine

One thing/person you love:
Law McGraw

And there you have it...another smattering of me condensed in list form.

Go Spartans!

Seven years after graduation, I still bleed green and gold. Tonight the Glenbrook North Spartans won the boys state basketball championship. From Chris Collins to Pete Carroll, no team was able to win it all until this year. A couple of years ago, the Spartans were known as the High School Hazers. We may have redeemed ourselves just a little bit tonight. Let's hope so.

Congrats Spartans!!!!

You Have...

"...a way of making me feel like I was put on Earth in the plum right place. Not like those times when I'd look in the mirror and see nothing but a reflection."

This weekend, I was unable to make it downtown to see the St. Patrick's Day parade or to view the dyeing of the Chicago River. Luckily, Law McGraw was able to take some pictures for me and allow me to see it virtually. It was almost as if I was standing on the edge of the Chicago River seeing it in person.

That got me to thinking. What if the advancement of technology will one day stop us from ever going anywhere to see things in person? What if we just experienced everything through our computers and virtual space? All we would have to do was look at some digital images. Scary. I don't think that I ever want it to get to that point. Maybe that's why I still don't have a digital camera.

They Grow Up So Fast

In a blink of an eye, my quarter-century mark is coming up in several months. I've noticed that all around me, people are growing up quickly. Most of my friends my age at work are all married. And if they're not married, they're in super serious relationships with individuals that they've been dating since they were in high school. Next month, one of my closest friends from college is getting married. Just today, I found out that another one of my close friends got engaged. (Congrats, Jon and Lauren!)

As for me, I feel that I just got comfortable with my job and figured out the ropes. After 2.5 years, I've become one the "senior" members of the organization. But in no way do I feel like one of the senior members. As for the rest of my personal life, I have no idea what I'm doing. It's like the blind leading the blind, except no one is leading me. I'm just wildly grasping on my own. I've started the business school search and the GMAT studying, but is this what I really want to do? I've entered a relationship that keeps me grinning like an idiot, but horribly scared at the same time. What if I mess things up? In terms of financial security, I have a small buffer saved up in accounts scattered throughout, but by no means am I independently wealthy. Do I even have enough for a down payment on a condo? Maybe the bigger questions is -- is Chicago going to be home? Or is the West Coast calling out to me?

Less than a decade ago, I thought the biggest decisions were choosing a college and a major. In retrospect, those decisions weren't life-altering. But then again, I'll look back upon these decisions someday and realize that they're not so life-altering either. Everything always has a way of working themselves out.

Low Expectations = Happiness?

I'm currently disappointed as a result of something very silly and irrational. I won't even go into the details of it, since it's so stupid.

But it did get me started thinking about disappointment in general. For most of my life, I held high expectations for myself and the people around me. But once individuals started to fail me or hurt me, I lowered all of my expectations. At some point even, I became numb to disappointment. I had forgotten what it felt to have high expectations for someone or something and to be let down by them.

Is it better to have high expectations and be sorely disappointed when lofty goals are not met or to have low/no expectations such that you're never disappointed?

Sweeter than a Caramel Hershey Kiss

This may be embarassing to a certain someone, but I just had to shelve it here for all eternity in virtual space. This is the sweetest thing that I've read in a long time.

"...And I want to be good, especially to you."

Know Me. Love Me.

I've always loved personality tests and online surveys. As if I seriously needed someone else to tell me what kind of person I am. But lo and behold, I have a weird fascination for filling out forms.

10 random things about me:
1. I'm super competitive. Especially at things that don't really matter.
2. I can't curl my tongue. It's apparently a recessive trait. Although, a certain someone just thinks that I'm a freak.
3. I'm a sucker for marketing and advertisements. Slap a "New!" sticker on anything and I'll buy it.
4. I swim like a rock. Apparently, a lack of body fat prevents you from floating very well.
5. I really like sarcasm and deadpan humor. Could Chandler Bing BE anymore of my soulmate?
6. I'm in love with Michael Vartan. Seriously.
7. I love things with "beady" eyes. Just ask Mikers or I for a complete explanation on what "beady" eyes look like.
8. I've become an expert on hemofiltration, hemodiafiltration, ultrafiltration, and convection in the past 2.5 years.
9. I love star-shaped donuts and Snapple Real Facts. Plus, I'm neurotic about crossword puzzles.
10. I'm an eternal optimist.

9 places i have been:
1. Hong Kong
2. England
3. Los Angeles
4. Boston
5. New York
6. Philadelphia
7. San Francisco
8. Canada
9. Chicago

8 things i want to do before i die:
1. Have kids and raise them
2. Own a house
3. Backpack through Europe
4. Travel through Asia
5. Get my MBA
6. Open my own business
7. Learn why Canadian Corn Pops are different from American Corn Pops
8. Find true love

7 ways to win my heart:
1. Be passionate about something
2. Laugh a lot
3. Be extremely witty - NOT knock-knock funny
4. Be kind to others
5. Know what you want
6. Use your imagination
7. Humor me when I have silly ideas

6 things i believe in:
1. The divinity of humanity
2. Selflessness
3. Democracy
4. Progressive values
5. The importance of being a good parent
6. Myself

5 things i am afraid of:
1. Death
2. Never realizing my full potential
3. Never finding a job I love
4. Snakes and all other reptiles and amphibians
5. Having children that don't respect me

4 of my favorite items in my bedroom:
1. My pile of unfinished crossword puzzles
2. A college graduation picture of myself, Mom, and Dad
3. My down comforter
4. My IKEA rug with animal tracks

3 things i do everyday:
1. Read -- a book, a magazine, my e-mail
2. A crossword puzzle
3. Talk to Law McGraw -- on the phone, in person

2 things i am trying not to do right now:
1. Eat an entire package of Reese's Pieces
2. Smear ink all over my hands

1 person i want to meet:
1. Carly Fiorina

Mail Me a Snail

With the current technological advances, a friend is always only an email or a cell phone call away. We've all gotten so used to instant gratification. There's nothing like being able to instantly catch up with a friend through a phone call or sending oodles of electronic information to someone in another time zone.

But this weekend, I was reconnected with a traditional form of communication -- snail mail. I received a package containing a greeting card, a chocolate lollipop, and a very cute bunny pen. I must admit that the entire package made me truly happy. Whether it was merely because of the fact that I received a package or if it was because it was from someone very special to me, I can't exactly pinpoint what the source of the happiness was. There's nothing like reading a greeting card and smiling like a fool the entire time. It's almost like reading a book. There's so much emotion and feelings involved in writing a greeting card that can be captured by the receiver of the card. The best part of the package was the fact that it was sent by someone that lives 5 miles away whom I talk to every single day. He was able to surprise me in such a way that it made me feel truly special.

I've always been a huge fan of instant gratification. Maybe it's been compounded from working in a very aggressive corporate environment, but I've never been the most patient person. But that package this weekend made me rethink the beauty of a handwritten letter or greeting card. Maybe I'll have to re-adopt the art form before the United States postal service decides to increase the cost of a postage stamp once again.